Member-only story
There is no Such Thing as Me, a Girl.
This is my last chance. This is my last chance for anyone to see me. Do not leave me alone.
I thought that after eight years, I would be used to it. I thought I would be used to it by the time I was twelve. I kept telling myself that this was the year I would stop whining as the years went by. I never did accept my fate, though, because that day would never come. How could it be? Being without something is hard to accept.
Okay, so hello. I am a girl who is eighteen years old and I don't have a name. It wouldn't really matter if I gave myself one. It's not something that would ever be said about me, anyway. The nicest thing I could do was hang out in someone else's family's house and act like one of their names was mine, as if I could feel the comfort they share with each other. I can't make the ties that can't be broken. Because I really don't exist.
It took some time to accept. That doesn't mean I accept it as permanent yet, but I understand my situation a lot better now than I ever could. I already said it clearly, and I don't mean it in any way that's not true. I'm not real. It seems like the world itself doesn't believe I exist. I can't say how badly I don't want to live this way, and even if I could, no one would listen.
